and I’m actually having a few lately.
that doesn’t mean I still have moments of complete clarity where I realize that I can do whatever I want, go wherever I want, choose whatever I want, and be with whoever I want, because that is the world I live in.
I can create whatever situation I want for myself. So can you. It doesn’t mean that there aren’t trade-offs and compromises, or things that need to be given up in order to create these other things, but whatever you truly, absolutely want to create, you can.
It takes hard work, discipline, a thick skin, and many MANY reality checks, but it’s all there for you 🙂
I know these days will pass. I know they are a function of what I have been allowing myself to do lately, or NOT do lately – how I have been letting myself off the hook for things that mean a lot to me to stick with, and how I have been compromising feelings and plans for my future for the sake of immediate pleasure, safety, and fun. I am forgiving myself for those things, because it is fine to have those times, but I can’t deny the effect they have on me and my self esteem and self assurance of what i am capable of.
Now after writing this post, I’m realizing that I am rolling over and taking these dark days – maybe it’s because maybe I deep down have wanted some dark days? Yikes!
Reality checks – see!? 🙂